The Romantic Language of Eye Contact

One of the most precious human senses we use daily is sight. We use the eyes to accomplish more than what you may expect – we use them to read, to avoid bumping into dangerous objects, to appreciate the colors of nature, to drive around town, and … to communicate? That's right. Even if you are not consciously aware, we use our eyes to express our true feelings when communicating with others, combining non-verbal communication with verbal communication.

In the research field, the study of eye-related nonverbal comunication is called oculesics. Eye communication spans across many research topics, including eye track studies, the recent introduction of eye writing from French researcher Jean Lorenceau, and of course the various types of eye contact that are used in different social situations, such as business meetings (formal setting), parties (informal settings), or dating (romantic settings).

One of the hot fields of research study is the connection between eye contact and flirting when it comes to pursuing romantic interests. This has been called 'eye contact flirting' and 'eye flirting' in various how-to blogs on the Web. Have you ever felt like you were mesmerized while looking into another person's eyes? Well, maybe it was the hypnotizing eye color, but more likely it was the slight movements of the eye gaze.

There are many ways to interpret eye contact, especially in the realm of romance. Here are five common situations that you might find yourself in with someone you just met, a significant other, or someone you see from across the room!

1. Peeking

This is how flirting all begins. Out of the corner of your eye, you notice someone looking your way while waiting for your morning coffee. You look up slightly to confirm your suspicions, and the gaze is broken by a quick turn of the neck. You turn the other way and feel the gaze again. Turn back and forth until you make eye contact. These brief but noticeable glances are known as peeking. In most cultures, meeting eyes is a friendly greeting and welcomes a conversation. Also, a smile won't hurt at this point if you want to get that first 'hello' with the peeker!

2. Side to Side Eye Contact

The other person takes initiative and comes over for a chat. When talking to someone, the last thing you want to do is give the other person a 'death stare' and mistakenly challenge him or her to a duel. To avoid this mishap, try shifting your gaze from one eye to the other within two-second intervals. However, because your eyes already move in quick, sharp jumps every second known as saccades, this naturally helps with the side-to-side gazing technique.

3. Triangular Gaze

When you become more comfortable with the person of interest over time, you can try the Triangular Gaze to heat things up, without being too forward – glance at the left eye, the right eye, then the lips. As you may have figured out, your gaze follows a somewhat triangular pattern that is just calling for that anticipated kiss!

4. Extended Gaze

It is by all means not a bad thing to want to look at someone with an extended gaze... that is a natural sign of showing attraction toward someone else! It is very possible that you feel sparks or that feeling of 'love at first sight' with the other person, but remember that eye contact is an invitation for conversation. If the other person rejects the offer, as observed by the rolling of the eyes or straight out walking away, it may be wise to tone down that gaze.

 

5. Dilated Pupils

As one of the most intriguing human organs, the eyes function like a camera, with the pupils acting as lens. Pupils will change in size and dilate (get bigger) for many reasons, including being in dark areas and seeing someone or something that you find visually attractive. For a surefire way to determine mutual attraction with the person of interest, take a close look at his or her eyes. The pupils will tell nothing but the truth.

As you can see, the eyes often speak louder than words, especially when it comes to romance. It helps to know what to look for and how to react when you notice one of these eye contact patterns. Even if you are in a committed relationship, speaking to your partner with your eyes is worth a peek, wouldn't you say so?

Blimey! British English Expressions made Easy Peasy

In honor of the upcoming Summer Olympics 2012 to be held in London, England, I thought it would be fun to test out your grand knowledge of British English expressions. After all, British English and American English consist of very different expressions and vocabulary terms relating to food, greetings, and everyday lingo. You have probably come across these words/phrases in the Harry Potter novels, overheard them on television, or even heard them used by friends, but what do these British expressions really mean? Go ahead and test your linguistic wits. Have fun!

PART I

Choose the correct definition for each word or phrase.

1. Barmy: (a) to go mad or crazy / (b) excellent

2. Blimey: (a) to blame someone / (b) exclamation of surprise

3. Bob's your uncle: (a) an insult / (b) “...and that's it”

4. Cheerio: (a) friendly way of saying goodbye / (b) breakfast cereal

5. Codswallop: (a) nonsense; baloney / (b) a tasty British delicacy

6. Drop a clanger: (a) to drop a heavy tool / (b) make an embarrassing mistake

7. Fancy: (a) to desire something / (b) very fashionable

8. Full of beans: (a) someone who curses too much / (b) to have lots of energy

9. Hunky-dory: (a) excellent / (b) a very good looking man

10. On about: (a) to talk about something / (b) to really like someone or something

PART II

Now let's look at how these expressions are used in context before revealing the answers. Go on and fill in the blanks with the correct words/phrases.

1. The gentleman ___________ after he mistook his friend's mom for his grandmother.

2. See you tomorrow in class. ____________!

3. Sally ___________ the cupcakes that she saw in the bakery.

4. Nathan was ____________ after he drank three energy drinks within an hour.

5. You'd have to be __________ to visit London without trying black pudding.

6. What are you ____________? Your new haircut looks great!

7. Oh ___________! That alligator is huge!

8. Traveling during the summer vacation would be ____________.

9. Jimmy's father told him that he was talking a load of ___________ after he denied breaking the window.

10. Pudding is very simple to make. First, pour the pudding powder into a bowl. Next, mix the powder with milk. Finally, put the bowl in the refrigerator to chill and __________!

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Ready to see your results? Here are the long-awaited answers:

Part I

Barmy (a), Blimey (b), Bob's your uncle (b), Cheerio (a), Codswallop (a), Drop a clanger (b), Fancy (a), Full of beans (b), Hunky-dory (a), On about (a)

Part II

1. dropped a clanger, 2. cheerio, 3. fancies, 4. full of beans, 5. barmy, 6. on about, 7. blimey, 8. hunky-dory, 9. codswallop, 10. Bob's your uncle

Now you're ready to head out and mingle with some new friends in London while using some of these British expressions.  Cheers!

Speaking Without a Voice: A Glance at the SpeechJammer

What should be a quiet, relaxed environment to read a book or enjoy the scenery is interrupted by the loud voice booming into your eardrums, albeit a loud friendly voice. This social fellow is just trying to make conversation but talks way more than to your liking. It’s times like this that you want to silence them in the most unobtrusive way possible… and it’s times like this that maybe a SpeechJammer would come in handy, otherwise known as the ‘Silencing Gun’.

Imagine pointing a device at someone from far away to stop them from talking. Sounds like something from the Twilight Zone, but two Japanese researchers have made such a seemingly sci-fi type device a reality. No need to worry about giving off dangerous gamma rays or hurting the unsuspecting victim in any way. The device is said to literally “jam” someone’s voice, caused by jumbled thoughts in the brain.

There are some interesting language aspects to this device. First is the notion of proper turn-taking rules in the communication process, often studied in the field of sociolinguistics. In many cultures around the world, it is perceived to be rude when someone talks too much or interrupts another person’s turn to speak. We’ve all been there and admittedly probably done it, since we do not focus very much on our own voice as with what others are saying. One sided conversations almost never lead to meaningful dialogue, and worst of all, they will get irritating quick!

With a more neurological perspective, the researchers based the SpeechJammer concept on medical devices that have been used in the field of speech therapy to help people with speech problems, especially stuttering. The Silencing Gun uses a device/technique called Delayed Auditory Feedback (DAF), which helps stutterers to reduce their stuttering after hearing their own voice at a slight delay. How is this possible? The DAF device can be used in two different ways. The speech delay can be set at around 50-70 milliseconds to help reduce stuttering at a normal speaking rate. The DAF device can also play speech back to the speaker with a delay of about 200 milliseconds, which increases spoken fluency through slow speech with stretched vowels. On the flip side, non-stutterers who use the DAF device will either start stuttering or not be able to speak completely. The echo effect causes the brain to become disoriented and shuts down the region that is responsible for speech.

As much as you may want to test out the SpeechJammer for yourself, this device is still a prototype. For now, you can just go the old-fashioned route and do whatever it takes to escape unwanted chatter, whether it be politely excusing yourself from the room or putting on your headphones while turning the volume knob to maximum.

The Growing Phenomenon of Unwords becoming Real Words

There is something to be said about the English language when words like “tebowing” and the recently coined “linsanity” elicit a meaningful connotation, especially among the diehard fans in the sports arena relating to the preceding terms. While the act of “tebowing” refers to the Denver Broncos quarterback Tim Tebow's praise to God by kneeling on one knee on the sidelines, the phenomena of “linsanity” is sweeping the nation, referring to the prominent and rising talent of the New York Knicks' Jeremy Lin, the first American-born Chinese to make it big in the NBA.

The creation of new words seems to weave itself into all arenas of life. In movies and TV, we see Elvish (Lord of the Rings), Klingon (Star Trek), and the language of wizards (Harry Potter) being invented for the new race of characters. In sports, we have the above mentioned play on the big names, Tim Tebow and Jeremy Lin. Even in Hollywood, the names of celebrity couples are lovingly morphed together, such as Brangelina (Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie), Tomkat (Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes), and Bennifer (Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner). The common thread that ties these word creations together is that all of them carry a specific meaning that you pick up through hearsay.

And who can ever forget the countless “bushisms” or “Bush speak” that President Bush made popular and memorable during his term in office? According to Wikipedia.org, a Bushism is defined as “unconventional words, phrases, pronunciations, … and semantic or linguistic errors that have occurred in the public speaking of former President of the United States George W. Bush...” These -isms mostly refer to the amusing phrases or quotes that appeared during his time as President and on the campaign trail, but mispronounced words abound. Try saying the following words at normal speed: nuclear, subliminal, and Internet. Pretty easy, right? Well perhaps it's the pressure of appearing in front of the TV cameras, or maybe it's the big crowds of American citizens staring his way, but President Bush just can't seem to say these words right during live press conferences and debates. For example, he prefers to talk about the “new-kee-lar” war, the “subliminable” messages, and the Internets that seem to run all aspects of our lives.

One website that celebrates the creation of new words is unwords.com. The tagline says it all: “Changing the English language one word at a time.” If for some reason you want to impress your friends by using “new” jargon that just sound like difficult GRE words, you can refer to this website for ideas, listed A through Z. The English language is all about syllables, tone stress, vowel/consonant placement, and intonation. If you can split words into syllables, just mix and match and voila – a new language! Just make sure that people know what everything means. Or maybe you can just rehearse some Bushisms and brighten someone's day with a little laugh session.

My fascination with language creation will likely be explored in the next few posts, so stay tuned!

Mr. Bean-On new years with his frends (Great Quality)

Just in time for the New Year...

... PART 2 ...




Toast can mean different things depending on context – there's the crunchy toast you eat for breakfast, you can “be toast” if you're late to work, and then there's the celebratory toast associated with the clinking of wine glasses to offer words of encouragement, salutations, or even to ring in the new year. Here is a taste of how people from regions around the world say “Cheers!” in style:

China – Gān bēi (literally means 'dry cup')
France – A votre santé ('to your health')
Spain – Salud
Germany – Prost
Hawaii – Okole Maluna
Italy – Cin Cin (formal); Salute (informal)
Japan – Kampai
Korea – Chukbae
New Zealand – Kia Ora('good health')
Philippines – Mabuhay
Zulu – Oogy wa-wa


Ring in the New Year with rhythm! You may have heard the song “Auld Lang Syne” before... it's one of those songs where you likely recognize the tune but just can't remember what it's called. This song is commonly sung on New Year's Eve, but what does the song title mean? The words 'Auld Lang Syne' originate from the Old Scottish dialect and literally translates to “Old Long Ago”, a song about love and friendship in the past.

Just to get into the New Year's mood, check out one of the funniest Mr. Bean episodes where he celebrates New Year's Eve with two friends. You can hear the jolly bunch singing 'Auld Lang Syne' at the 7:00 mark...


Happy holidays and Happy New Year 2012!!!

6 Fun Facts about Winter holiday lingo

It's that time of year where the big man in red, with the frosty white beard, stealthily slides down your chimney with a ho-ho-whole lot of presents to put under that Christmas conifer (er, I mean tree) in the spacious living room of yours. Just don't forget to set out a plate of cookies au lait (what I mean is with milk... sorry) to say “gracias” (which means “thank you”... here we go again) for the well-deserved gifts. Take a look at the unique and somewhat unusual origins and history behind some of the popular lingo you will surely hear about during the Winter holiday season.



What is a holiday party without some phoradendron – or in plain terms – mistletoe ! This feisty little sprig of green shrubbery has the unexplained power to make almost anyone within inches of each other (and under the mistletoe) want to lock lips during the holiday season. Maybe it won't seem as romantic to know that mistletoe is actually poisonous to humans if consumed, but it provides nutritious food for creatures like birds and butterflies. Mistletoe also provides an important source of pollen and nectar for bees. It still makes a great centerpiece of a room, don't you think?



Sometimes, we just need to laugh with a “ha ha ha” (typical laughter), “hee hee” (giggle), “teehee” (cute giggle), or a “muahaha” (very evil laughter). But you might get a strange look if you laugh aloud with a “Ho Ho Ho” . Only Santa can pull this off! The term “ho” is actually used to call or attract attention to oneself, sometimes used after a word referring to land. For example, sailors in the olden days are said to have hollered phrases like: Eastward ho! or Land ho! During Christmas, however, jolly old Santa Claus supposedly “ho ho ho's” heartily as an exclamation or expression of amusement as found in many 19th century representations of the cheery man. There are many ways to laugh, but Santa probably does it best!



With Rudolph's nose so red and bright, can he and his brethren really fly? Well, only during Christmas Eve it seems... but normally, reindeer are excellent swimmers (at about 4-6 mph) and fast runners with their hooves acting like snowshoes for extra traction. More interesting is that both male and female reindeer have antlers! The origins of the word 'reindeer' come from ancient languages: 'deer' originates from the Middle English word 'der' meaning “beast” and from the Old English word 'dor'. The origins of 'rein' comes from the Old Norse word 'hreinn'. Far from being beastly, reindeer are said to be gentle animals, nice enough that they won't make fun of you or other reindeer!



The holiday season just doesn't seem complete without some festive food and drinks. One of the most traditional (and likely creamiest) beverages during Christmas time is eggnog , which is typically made of cream, milk, sugar, raw eggs (lots of it), cinnamon, and nutmeg. While this beverage supposedly originated in Norfolk, England as a strong ale, the word 'eggnog' comes from a Middle English term which literally means: eggs inside a small, wooden, carved mug that is used to serve alcohol. The actual 'nog' is defined as “any beverage made with beaten eggs, usually with alcoholic liquor.” However, most of the 'nog' served at holiday parties seem to lack the booze altogether, but no complaints.

...PART 2 in the next post!...